The last 24 hours have been a real challenge to my ability to stay motivated. Of course, I've probably slept through more than half of them.

The first bummer had to do with my little ebay empire-in-the-making. I had two pieces of china arrive at their destination broken. That's never happened before, and I packed the broken ones as carefully as ever. The customers didn't buy insurance. I really could have said, "That's too bad, you should have bought insurance" but, aside from being a terrible business practice, it's not in my nature. I offered both a refund. I don't feel so bad about the antique dealer who bought the sugar dish. But I feel heartbroken on behalf of the lady who was trying to give her daughter-in-law a completer piece for Christmas.

Ebay was so fun for me because, like yard sales, they're such win-win situations. But now I just feel like I've taken on the stress of somebody I don't even know.

Worse, I feel that I may know who to blame - besides myself. I think "Animal" at the Shipping Staion might have been careless with them. The Shipping Station is effectively run by Mary and Billy, but owned by some other dude with no sense of humor nor any people skills. His son, who won't wear shoes, comb his hair, and often seems not to have had a bath, also works there....or at least he's in there, in the back, using the phone, buying action figures over the telephone. That's the guy I think of as "Animal". He was there the day I sent both of these things and I saw him take my items into the back.

Is it wrong to suspect "Animal" on the basis of his appearance and previous demeanor? Or am I just using common sense?

Anyway, I'd care more about the philosphical issues of being mad at "Animal" if I could breathe, which I can't. For some reason, last night, I had this huge asthma attack. I dragged myself out to meeting for worship this morning, but came back and layed down on the sofa....where I've been all day, sleeping, gasping, taking my inhalers, falling back to sleep etc. I've got to go to the doctors tomorrow.

No more fooling around.