Last night Theresa and I went to the auction in Taneytown, "Where things are either 50 cents or three hundred dollars!" as she said. Taneytown remains my favorite auction, and its auctioneer remains my favorite auctioneer. He also does straw and hay auctions and livestock auctions. He personally and the auction in general retain the strong, sharp flavor of the Old County. He had to carefully spell out the name of a highly collectible tin toy: he knew that it was collectible and valuable, but it's appeal was completely foreign to him. "What have you got next?" he asked his assistant "Two weird lookin' stuffed animals." the elderly man replied, holding up a stuffed Elmo and Kermit the Frog. This response brought good natured laughter from the women...

in attendance most of whom have raised children. In front of me a lady cautioned her mother who was reaching for a cardboard box to "watch out for any mice" in a calm voice that belied a country upbringing. If you're sitting in a tin garage full of who-knows-what which is only used once a week or so, you're bound to run into "critters"

Meanwhile, an American flag with 48 stars sold for $50. It was a little dirty, but no one there let it touch the ground. A huge stuffed cow sold for the same price. Every time a John Deere item came up, the excitement was palpable. The most arcane farm equipment was readily identified by the auctioneer, and though it was terribly warm and the crowd was thin he remained steadfastly patient. A bidder got slightly confused as the number of bidders rose and held his card up anxiously. "I've got you at $7.00, sir" The auctioneer said mildly. At Ellicott City the auctioneer would have said, "That's you. You can be $8.00 if you want to." And it's air conditioned in Ellicott City.

"Where's the restroom?" asked Theresa.

I'm afraid I gave her a blank stare. I was pretty sure it was in the gas station next door (even though the auction is selling food. Don't tell anybody) but wondered if I might be wrong. "Um. You know, I'm not sure. It might be, um, the gas station. Maybe check with the office?"

When she came back I asked if I'd been right. "Yep. They gave me a key attached to a really large wooden pig. I guess nobody goes home with that by accident."

Welcome to my world.

But of all the lots that were up for bid, there was one lot in which I was most keenly interested. It consisted of things I was completely familiar with, as well I should have been. They'd been in my house for weeks. They were all items that had come with lots that I'd won from various auctions in the past month but couldn't sell either e-Bay or in my booth. After all, I have a certain reputation to maintain as a seller in both places....and coming from the person who now has a 1970's vintage cardinal-print-shellacked-onto-pine clock ready to go for a buyer in California and who is actively marketing a stuffed gorilla that sings "Great Balls of Fire" this is saying something.

All of this is stuff I'd taken down to the exchange last week. An older man took the box right out of my hands. "Do you mind? There might be something in there I can use." he said.

"No problem. Enjoy it in good health." I said. (and as my own health seems to somewhat steadily, though slowly, decline, I find myself saying that more and more)

I was really interested to see what it might sell for, but we began to get hungry and The Hub was home needing to be fed. Moreover, I'd already spent $35 - an almost record sum for me.

There might be a fair number of hygiene challenged, taste impaired, and over due for dental work people around the County but one thing I admire greatly: Nothing ever goes to waste.