....but their bark, apparently, is worse than their bite. Today I was finally able to get through to someone at the IRS with regard to our tax situation: specifically, we haven't got the money to pay our income taxes. It turned out I had been trying to get through on the wrong #, and I got the correct one from the IRS web site which was easier to use than a lot of other government agency web sites I've had to fool around with. When I down loaded a form to use to request a payment plan, I noticed another toll free number at the bottom of that to call if you are requesting an extension of time to pay your taxes.....which is what we really need since we can probably get the money together to pay the taxes in about 60 days. ( We already paid the state taxes)

So, I called the number and spoke to a pleasant guy who called himself Mr. Bowman. He explained that extensions of up to 120 days for payment can be granted and approved over the phone. He took a little information - mostly to verify that we had paid our taxes on time in the past.

At this point, the dog, who had been laying quietly by my feet, lifted his massive head and perked up his ears. He looked up into my face with an expression of deep concern, gave my legs a quick sniff, and then jumped up and started barking. I wonder what "nervous tension" smells like to a dog? He checked one door than the other, looking for whatever was scaring me, then went on patrol around the whole downstairs barking ominously.

Then he came back and zero'd in on the phone, which, I admit I was clenching so tightly my knuckles were white.

"Woo-woo-woo-woof! Woof! WOOF!" he said, backing up and giving me a head toss, I think trying to tell me - in case I didn't know - that the PHONE was what was scaring me and I should drop it and back away so he could move in and bite it...or at least sniff it to death. I gave him a hand sign to be quiet, but he would have none of it, and streched out his neck to nose the phone out of my hand!

"WOOF!" he said emphatically to the startled gentleman at the IRS.

"Excuse me" I said into the reciever. "Winston! Calm down! It does NOT help to bark at the IRS. It's okay." and I made an effort to slow my breathing and calm myself. I gave the dog a reassuring smile. He sat down on his haunches to and looked at me steadily. "Are you still there?" I asked the tax guy, who, by now, was cracking up.

"Wow, I thought I was about to get a virtual dog bite!" Mr. Bowman laughed, "What kind of dog is that?"

"He's a mastiff. He's actually very friendly."

"Okay, I'll take your word for it, Mrs. P. I have you approved for a 60 day extension. You'll recieve a confirmation letter in the mail in approximately 7 days. Your due date will be June 15. Will that be enough time?"

"Should be, Sir. Thank you for your help."

That was easy. When I hung up Winston wagged his tail and settled back down again. Even though he can't help us with our taxes, heck, even as big as he is we can't claim him as a deduction, it was still nice to have him around. It's good to know someone is willing to fight on your side...even if his biggest weapon is a great big slobbering goober.